Top 5 Places To Hide (GET RID OF) Elf On A Shelf:
5: In the garbage.
You know you hate that effing thing. Just throw it away.
4: In a foreign country.
UPS or FedEx ship it to any country, and poof, it’s gone.
3: Outside on a windy day.
Hopefully a big gust of wind will pick it up and send it hurling into the sky, and out
of your life forever and ever. Fingers crossed.
2: The Moon.
For $25, N.A.S.A. will take shitty toys up to the Moon and leave them to float in
space for all eternity.
1: Grandma and Grandpa’s House:
They bought the damn thing. Let them fuck with it.
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