My family and I recently went on vacation. Yay! We consist of a wife, husband, 3.5 year old daughter and 23 month old son. So you now know, that the vacation wasn’t a vacation at all. It was more like a Chinese torture chamber. But I digress.

Relax, my ass!

While my kiddies had an amazing time, my husband and I struggled to relax. We stayed at a kid friendly resort and had the bestest, non-relaxing vacation of my tenure as a mom. It caused me to realize that every mom and dad at the resort happened to be in the same boat.

Drink? Yes, please!

My hubby and I came prepared though. We brought supplies. I’m not talking Disney movie DVDs and favorite toy supplies. I’m talkin’ alcohol, people. I’m talkin’ vodka. I’m talkin’ beer. I’m talkin’ Bloody Mary’s.

And I must say, I didn’t realize nor did I intend to, but I’m wicked impressed that hubby and I can wipe out a 1.75 liter of Kettle One in a week.

I was also pretty excited that other moms and dads were doing the same. I came to notice that there were:

3 Kinds of Parents at the Resort:

1. The “I’m not really drinking alcohol, or am I??” Parents:  These were the people that walked around with a coffee cup and lid, so you couldn’t really tell what was in the cup. When we ALL KNOW, it was filled with liquor. Come on, you ain’t foolin’ no one sweetheart.
2. The “Yup, I’m having a drink!” Parents:  These folks walked around with a red solo cup as if to say, YES, you bet your ass I have alcohol in here, and I’m not afraid to show it.
3. The “Fuck the World, Don’t Ask Me For Shit.” Parents:  That was us. We arrived on the pool scene each day with a cooler, fully stocked and ready to go. We cracked beers and drank from the can like hillbillies. We also rocked the red solo cups for mixed drinks. We had it all, and drank it all. We were not about to step into a full day of baby chasing and temper tantrums ill prepared. We came loaded for bear.

Aaannd, I’m now realizing that we seem like total boozers. But you know what? It was fun, and it totally took the edge off our non-vacation, vacation. So cheers to us! And cheers to all of you who attempted a vacation this summer, but found yourself needing another vacation when you got home.

Did you vacation this summer? Did it suck for you, but fun for the kids? Share your story with us at sothishappened@bleepingmotherhood.com