My Alexa is growing on me. I didn’t think I’d be that into asking a speaker to do things for me for pure enjoyment, but I guess that’s where I am at this point in my life as a mom.

No clue what the heck I’m talking about? You can read all about what the Alexa device is here, and you can also grab your very own right now.

While we’re at it, here’s my Top 5 Favorite Things I like to ask of my Alexa:

5: Play Music

The speaker quality of the Echo is pretty good. And it can play any song whenever the hell I tell it to. (With the Amazon Music Trial). Sometimes if she can’t understand my request, she’ll say “sorry I didn’t get that.” Which makes me super annoyed and I then utter, you stupid bitch under my breath. I then repeat my request, slower and louder and Alexa plays as requested.

4: Ask her to tell a funny joke

My kids love to ask Alexa to tell us a joke. The jokes are sometimes pretty clever or may warrant a knee slap. For example, I just asked Alexa to tell me a joke. Here’s what I got:

Why was the Miami dolphin called for a foul?

He tripped a player on porpoise.

(eh hem, it keeps the kids entertained, right?)

3: Ask her to launch the torpedoes

Bleeping Kerri turned me on to this cool Alexa command. I wasn’t exactly sure what “launch the torpedoes” was all about. I asked my husband if he knew of something cool Alexa did with that skill, so he just simply asked her, “Alexa, can you launch the torpedoes?” Alexa in turn launched the torpedoes. So there’s that.

2: Ask her what time is it

Have you ever been in the middle of something and wonder, gee, I wonder what time it is? You can ask Alexa what time it is. And she tells you. Can shit get any more real? Sometimes I can’t believe it myself.

1: Ask her to fart

I mean, this may not be the most dainty thing Alexa does, but I dare you to ask an Alexa to fart and NOT smile when she lets out a big ol’ toot. It definitely comes in handy when you need a break or a good laugh. Moms, keep it in your tool box for times when you need to cool off.

What is your favorite thing to ask your Alexa? Tell us now by commenting below or continuing the conversation on the Bleeping Motherhood Facebook page.