How many times when you were pregnant (or trying to get pregnant) did you have an idyllic scene in your head of how it was going to be when you had kids?  How many times has that scene in your head been crushed?  If you are like me, over and over.

It doesn’t end at pregnancy, does it?  The curse of the optimistic mom is still imagining idyllic scenes and then having them crushed over and over.  While it may feel like it is insanity, it can’t be helped.  This mom still dreams, and occasionally they still come true.

A great example of this is gardening.  What better way to have a beautiful experience with your children then having a garden.  Teaching them how to feed themselves, the basics of nature, the appreciation of the world around them.

I’ve tried gardening with children a couple of different ways and let me tell you what I’ve found to be the most successful.

5 Steps of Gardening With Children

Step 1 – No such thing as peaceful gardening: Let go of any expectation that this will be a peaceful experience where you will all commune with nature.  I’ve read and been inspired by those pinterest posts.  Either those moms meditate hourly to find their inner zen or those children take hallucinating drugs to be that calm in the garden.  So, know that it is unlikely to be peaceful.  You won’t be lost in your thoughts.  You’ll be constantly questioned about why you are doing it the way you are doing it.  Or asked multiple questions that may or may not revolve around dirt or gardening.  And you know you have to answer because this is meant to be a learning experience, right?  Blerg!

Step 2 – Find a place where they can feel useful:  Whether you give them a “children’s garden”, a series of pots or a section of your own garden where you haven’t planted anything, give them a place to be digging.  Unless they are skilled at raking or know the difference between a plant and a weed, they will be directly where you want to work.  And sometimes that can be difficult, as mom friend Robyn tells me about her children playing right where she’s trying to swing a pick-axe.  Mine tried to pull weeds next to me as I was pulling out a thorny thistle.  I definitely got thorns in my face.

Step 3 – Give them hard work: I like to have them do big energy busters when gardening.  Hauling dirt, raking big patches of weeds, things like that.  It may end up being slightly useful that more is hauled/raked and wears them out quickly.  The benefit to that is they may end up stopping and going and doing something else.  Then you can finish the thing in two minutes that was taking you 25 minutes with “help”.

Step 4 – Zero survival: If you do a children’s garden with them, which I have done, don’t expect any plants to survive.  We’ve done potted gardens and that potted soil is currently mixed with the sand box.  And that’s ok – it is their garden, their plants, their imaginative play.  Their experience with gardening keeps bringing them back to play and learn and I keep hope alive that each year they participate a little more productively.  There’s that mom optimism!

Step 5 – Slushies: End your gardening experience with slushies!  It helps everyone to end with a smile on their face.  Here’s a recipe for a vodka slushie.  Yes, I know it makes 20 servings.  I’m not judging.

Good luck with your garden!