My DH makes pancakes for the kids on the weekends. And he will make heart shaped pancakes for my daughter and she adores him for it. During the week, I don’t have time for that shit. My kids will get frozen waffles and black bananas. Well one morning, I realized that I was out of fricken frozen waffles. So to avoid a huge toddler tantrum I was forced to MAKE pancakes for my daughter.

So I’m the worst pancake maker ever. My pancakes suck.  And to top it off, her majesty wanted them in heart shapes. You can see my awful attempt at  heart shaped pancakes. I know, FUBAR..

Even though these pancakes look and taste like dog shit, Sophia is enjoying them, and I’m feeling pretty good. Now I’m feeling kind of high. So I get ballsy, and decide to try and create animal pancakes. Pancakes that are shaped like bear heads. So I make one circle for the bear face, and two small circles for the bear ears. The bear head cooks and I’m ready to show it off to my toddler Sophia, thinking she is going to effing LOVE this. So I gently scoop one up on a spatula, and hold it up in all my glory. And with my best singing voice, I ask:

“Who wants a fuuuuunnn paaanncaaakke?” Sophia turns, looks at it and says plainly:

“Bubba does.” Bubba is her little brother, who she would let eat crickets if I let her.

Screw me.  Screw me hard.

BTW, there’s the bear head pancakes. These actually look more like a couple of moles that I should probably get checked out at the dermy.