Top 5 Kids Stores That Can F* Off
5: Babies R Us
As a new mom, Babies R Us was my go to, and I’d buy my diapers there, and run there when I needed baby supplies because they gave you those stupid fricken coupons…you know the ones that are totally useless for diapers and not valid until March 14, 2045? Yeah, I don’t […]
It’s All A Bleeping Conspiracy
Children know exactly how to press our buttons. I believe that after my children go to sleep, they conspire with other toddlers via an ultra secret, ultra exclusive underground tunnel and discuss how to fuck with their parents. Because the next morning, there always seems to be an extensive, well thought out tantrum presentation. Every […]
Weekly Tip – Diaper Cream
My kids are the worst during diaper changing. They are strong little fuckers. They don’t sit still, and fight me during the ENTIRE diaper change. It’s wicked fun. Imagine now, changing their diaper and having to add a step because they have a diaper rash. Now I have to maneuver them in such a way […]
Neil Patrick Harris’ Thomas and Friends
It’s hard not to love some Neil Patrick Harris
Top 5 – Craigslist Edition
Top 5 “gently used” items that someone would definitely buy from you on Craigslist for $5. (You’d be surprised)
5: A Pregnancy Test
4: Diapers
3: Rectal Thermometer
2: Ginger (your recently deceased goldfish)
1: Your Neighbor’s Swedish Nanny
What is the oddest thing you ever bought on Craigslist?
Would You Rather
Make 10 trips to the grocery store in the same day with four small children,
or
Perform sexual favors for 10 hours for one morbidly obese man
Bleeping Chopped
I don’t know what it is about the show “Chopped”, but I fucking love it. Maybe it’s the randomness of the basket contents, or how the chefs are forced to make a reduction out of watermelon Kool Aid, but I’m in.
I sometimes wonder if they have babies and small children putting the basket contents together. […]
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